WTF Wednesday

I set my hair on fire the other night by leaning over a candle to try and talk to my husband. Seriously, my hair was on FIRE! I thought for sure my shirt caught on fire because I saw flames but thankfully I swatted it out before anything too serious happened. The smell of burnt hair was aplenty in the apartment but after a few snipped off burnt ends I'm back to normal. Or as close to normal as I'm ever going to get.

It did have me feeling like a little like this when I emerged from the flames alive and well...

 

I tried to put Olive on my shoulders but she wasn't having it.

 

 

 

 

Allow me to blow your mind.

Remember Avril Lavigne's EX-husband from Sum 41.... wanna see what he looks like now?!



Yea... I can't even believe it either. (Source)

WTF?! Nickelback!

After being sick all weekend in the most disturbing of ways I am finally feeling back to normal. In short I had the WORST period of my life. WTF?! Ovaries I think they were literally trying to kill me and make sure that I realize I am not ready to go through child birth any time soon.

(I don’t understand how in the HELL do you WOMEN do THAT?) 

 Monday I started eating right again (like really right – how I was eating when I lost weight before) and so far that’s been going great! I’ve been using the MyFitnessPal AP to keep up with calories and workouts (I’ve been honest) and I feel better…other than one thing… WTF is the deal with when you eat healthy you are always hungry!? I seriously eat 7 small meals a day …snacking on carrots, bananas, apples, etc all day long. My meals are well rounded but because they are so healthy they never keep me full for long. When I think about it I guess that is the way it is supposed to be and I get lazy with having to eat all the time that I like eating less times and feeling fuller… but that just doesn’t work for me when trying to lose weight and leads me to eating a shit ton at night - which is a big No No.

I love bananas and peanut butter!

I also have realized something else about myself this past week. I can’t complete long term goals. I suck at life and I don’t know WTF my problem is but its just the TRUTH and I’ve got to admit it. Remember my 28 day Challenge? Well that turned into a 16 day accomplishment. I got sick and got bored with it but it did teach me a lesson: I can do two week goals and that’s what I’m going to start doing instead of beating myself up about never accomplishing a bigger task. I will celebrate small victories. I am going to start up another 14 day challenge this Saturday too – I’ll explain later… 

 Last night was Taco Tuesday at the bar and CK and some of our friends decided it was time to feast on $1 tacos and cold beer. I actually went to the gym before we went to the bar and I ended up wearing my workout crops tucked into my Uggs with no shame. I was paranoid I stunk but no one said anything…so unless they are all just being nice I think the 40oz of body splash I put on worked. You’re probably wondering, “Terri where is the WTF moment” well, here it goes. I ended up making some new friends at the bar that wanted me to help them pick out songs on the Jukebox player thing and then they proceeded to put $20.00 in the damn thing. WTF?! $20.00 do you know how many credits that was?! I helped “L” as we will call her for about 15 minutes choosing different songs… but there were issues. She’s trashed and I’m trying to figure out what songs she wants me to play because she paid for it after all but then she said she hates Reggae and Jazz music and her favorite is Nickelback.

WTF?! NICKELBACK.

hahah Thank you Google.

 Shoot me in the GD face please. I let her play 3 stupid Nickelback songs then she bounced off with 11 credits still in the damn machine. I ended up picking all reggae and some new Madonna with the rest while thinking the whole time, “how do I get myself in these situations?” I am too damn nice. After I rejoined my group they all were laughing because they heard me say, “Nickelback?! Omg you’re Crazy” to the girl and then the Nickelback song Came on and L and her date started dancing to it. I’m sorry… I know I’m a bitch but WTF?! Kill me. 

Then this morning I came into work dressed up in heels and a skirt (normally I wear jeans and boots) because all my jeans are dirty and the one pair that is clean is freshly washed and I just didn’t feel like getting in them when they are super tight then take 5 mins to stretch them out and get them comfy… It was just not appealing at all after last night.

Instead, since it is warmer outside I am breaking out my nice skirts and heels to which shocked the guys I work with this morning into both of them looking at me confused, one saying I looked hot and the other saying, “That’s what’s wrong with all you southern girls never wearing any pants…getting in trouble”  WTF?! First off both of them are like brothers so it’s all in good fun and I absolutely love them but seriously I almost pee’d in my pants when he said that about “southern girls” I simply told him in the south it is just TOO DAMN HOT to wear pants much less anything else. Ever.

CK also bought these little suckers from Target the other day:

WTF!? Why have I never tired these before?

Dude Japanese/Chinese candy is where it is at! Go get you some YanYans Right now... its like cracker stick and icing but different.. I can't explain it just go. GO.

Oh, and just ONE more Nickelback picture.... hehe

lol Sorry if any of you like Nickelback... but you know it's still funny.

WTF Wednesday!?

I think I like WTF Wednesdays... It's like I can ramble about the oddest things that don't really go together. Much like my life.

Last Friday after I got off work I decided I deserved a pedicure. I did NOT take a before picture you do not ever want to see my funk nasty heels when they haven't had a pedicure in oh say over 7 months.

Oh sweet Heaven!

Then after all the usual stuff this happened:

They put warm paraffin wax stuff in plastic bags and then tied them around my feet massaging in the wax and then putting my feet in warm booties. WTF!? It was amazing! Why has this never happened to me before?

PS. I paid $10 bucks LESS than what I used to pay in MS. WTF?! Only $25 bucks to get a pedicure with white tips?!!! I'll be back ladies... I will be back!

Terri loves you.

If you're in Kirkland and need magic done to your feet go to:

Four Seasons Nails

Now, this is not Four Seasons work... I went home and decided to do my nails myself...

WTF?! is that cut from? And yes I'm a hand model now a Plus sized hand model.

I guess it was "Beauty" week at our house last week because Olive also got her first Haircut in WA.

She got full paper treatment with full pamper price. $60 bucks. WTF!?

I guess the little shit was worth it though, she came back super happy and supper clean. However, they cut her hair to damn short and she looked like a boy fox. I am not happy. I told them not to do the stupid short haired pom cut and they did it anyway. I like my girl to look like a pretty lion...like this:

Not a shaved Fox...

Look how pissed she is!

Thank God it's already starting to grow out a little...She's getting tired of me calling her the ugly Fox.

Wooooorkkk it.

I won't name the place because I'm not certain I like them but here's another thing that makes me go "hmmmm."

Early this week we got this in the mail... Now, CK might have dropped her off and picked her up but I made the damn appointment. He talked to ME and I know that Olive would never leave her mother out of a thank you card. Nor, does she have the skills to take a picture of herself so I'm guessing that they forged this letter. Not sure how I feel about this.

I've mentioned before on here that CK is a butcher as well as, a musician and we have a problem. 1) He comes home and smells like smoked meat. Olive flips out and wont stop licking him to death or sniffing for a good 45 minuets. 2) He makes me hungry when I smell him 3) He keeps bringing home delicious meaty things. WTF!?

Example A.

Gourmet beef and pork hot dogs. Say whaaaat.

I also decided something today that might have you saying WTF!?

I'm going to write a book.

Now, there is no deadline for this it might take my whole life but I am going to start on it soon. I love reading and for some reason I can't wait to develop a story and write it down so it turns real. How neat is that.... It will of course be filled with thousand of grammatical errors but hey, that's what editors are for!

What is something you want to do in your lifetime?

WTF Wednesday!?

Lets be silly today and do a WTF Wednesday! I totally stole this idea from one of my Favorite Bloggers RunningOffTheReeses Cely. I love her...I realllllly want her to be my friend but we live to far away and she lives in that state that I hate Texas..oh such is life.

At work the other day I sent BFF Haley (thecrappyblogger) this gem of a picture:

She responds with this:

I love her.

She is my other "other" half. If it was legal to marry more than one person AND gay marriage was legal in Mississippi then we would be married and be a wayyyy hotter version of this:

Plus throw Josh in soooo we would really be more like Polyamory...and we could all get shirts with this on it:

After we had that conversation I realized something Tragic and thanks to Internet my fears were confirmed.

There are NO O'Charley's on this entire side of the country. It's not that tragic but damn sometimes I miss those rolls and those loaded smashed potatoes. Haley and I have so many memories from High school with that place. Maybe I should open one. "DA OC"

I'm getting extremely PUMPED for one of my awesome friends weddings in November! CK and I just booked tickets so it's in stone AND we get to BOTH be in the wedding. Maybe we can be precious and walk together! I'm sure we will since both Nicole (the BRIDE) and Harvey (the GROOM) where in our wedding last June and we had them walk together (Nicole threatened my life if they didn't get to):

Check them out:

Hotties.

AND I think Nicole decided on what I will be wearing today:

It has Pockets! I'm totally pumped.

GUESS WHO IS BACK!!!

OMG. Fiona Apple, Never make me wait this long again before you release another CD!

PS.Iloveyou.

On Tuesday I walked out my front door to this:

WTF?! It was like 50 the day before and beautiful.

Thankfully it all melted away and has been beautiful and warm ever since.

CK also text/picture messaged me today and said, "check out my meat"....

.

.

.

.

.

.

I got really excited before I looked at the picture but it wasn't what I thought... such is life.

The GREAT news is though that after a month of looking for a full time butcher job he got the one of his dreams. Working for Bill the Butcher which is like a small ole time Butcher shop and it deals in only the best organic grass fed beef. He loves it and I love the paycheck. Between this and the music I finally feel like our life is settling in in Seattle. We are so happy...I literally sh*t rainbows now.

Lady GaGa you Crazy.

I love her music and her voice.

 I hate her stupid costumes and awful makeup.

Your new song "You and I" is Amazing...but when I saw the video I just sat there in complete amazement at how awful it was. WTF!? You don't make sense it's like the weirder you get the cooler you are... well I'm here to tell you in the "Real World" that shit isn't cool. It is insane and totally takes the shine away from your music and puts it on how big of a nutcase you can make yourself look like.

For Example:

Really...half woman/half robot AND you have no eyebrows... get over ya'self this is redic.

AND Why would a half robot/half woman be in the middle of a field in the first place?

Now your in S&M in a barn...a BARN. With ugly ass hair. Why blue? Are you sad? I'm sad Gaga... I'm a sad little monster after seeing this.

Now, you're a boy. Are you trying to confuse us because you pull this off a little tooo well.

Oh, and my personal favorite WTF moment... you're now a mermaid being bathed in a watering troff... In a BARN. Get the hell off that... how would a mermaid even get onto a Farm? There comes a point where you're creativity gets reckless. Please just release the music...no pictures, no videos, no visuals.

 Just sing and put the Special Effects Makeup DOWN. Oh and stop wearing meat...did you even stop to think about the person that would have to clean your seat up after you left pools of blood from RAW beef on it. Yuck.

On a more positive note is it just me or would this song not be a good slow jam to get busy to.

I think it's the beat...

Listen and Enjoy OR Watch and Cry.